Self-growth isn’t easy. In fact, it is quite hard. It is almost as challenging as addiction recovery. I failed myself, and I failed my partner to the point that I lost her to my own mental health. Ideally, I would like to rejoin her in a relationship, but she is cautious. And patient. She is sharply observing my behaviors and actions, waiting to see if I grow as a person before she evaluates a relationship in the future.
If I want that as bad as I say I do, then I need to take a period of time to myself. Or at least just do the inner work that is required to grow. She provides me with guidance and is invested in my journey. I shouldn’t let that go to waste by not taking the opportunity to grow as a person and potential partner. She has always looked out for my best interest, and I think it’s time to take her advice. It’s time to be single on purpose.